Dear <that's a lychee nut, honey> Children,
Please accept <no I don't know if they have any cheese from Wisconsin> my apologies <your brother gets to push the cart first> for being, <slow down with the cart!> as you put it, 'crabby' <I know you like to be silly and loud but the grocery store is not the place to do that you need to act like a 7th grader> at the grocery <do not stick your finger through the plastic on the hamburger!> store this <no we don't need orange juice, we already have some please put it back> evening. I <let your sister push the cart it's her turn.> don't know <Shoot! I forgot blueberries, can you go back and get some? Yes, I will stay in this aisle so you don't lose me> what could <no, I'm not buying you soda> have possibly <push the cart with BOTH FEET on the ground! It is not a scooter!> caused my foul mood <you almost hit that person, I told you to push the cart slowly> as we had lots of <I already said no, I am not going to change my mind!> time and you were <seriously, you have to go to the bathroom again?> behaving in an <please don't wear the bag of chocolate chips as a hat> angelic fashion as always.
Love, <Go stand in line with your father, I'm trying to pick out a toothbrush!>