Dear Children,
Eating in the living room is against the rules. It has been for a long time and this rule has not changed. Yes, occasionally I'll bend the rules and allow us to have popcorn on the sofa, or even dinner for a special treat. And yes, when you're ill I let you eat in the living room so you don't have to move. These are special occasions and do not indicate a permanent modification of the rules.
"Why?", you may ask, "Do I not allow you to consume tasty morsels while comfortably ensconced on the sofa, partaking of your favorite animated entertainment?" My answer, dear children, can be summed up in one word - CRUMBS. You leave crumbs. No matter what you are eating, or how carefully you claim to eat it, you leave crumbs! Crumbs everywhere - Sticking to my feet or my arms or my legs, trapped in the back of my knees..... AAAUGH! It's awful! NO. MORE. CRUMBS!
Love,
Mom
PS - I allow you to have fruit in the living room, but only because fruit does not produce crumbs. However, if start finding sticky spots ....
Try doing an archeological expedition in the sofa to see just how often the rules are ignored. I find unspeakable things stuffed deep into the couch, as if the children regarded the sofa as some kind of black hole which would suck the evidence into another dimension.
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